The Beyond Burger®

Welcome to The Beyond! We are a sci-fi/fantasy roleplaying forum. In this world, it's a game of survival; only the fittest will live. Don't worry, we won't bite; we've got an awesome staff team, and equally amazing members. Make sure to read over the rules before you begin rping!

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The Beyond Burger®

Welcome to The Beyond! We are a sci-fi/fantasy roleplaying forum. In this world, it's a game of survival; only the fittest will live. Don't worry, we won't bite; we've got an awesome staff team, and equally amazing members. Make sure to read over the rules before you begin rping!

Please register or login!

The Beyond Burger®

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    AttorneyAdmiral
    AttorneyAdmiral


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    Awaiting Approval  Empty Awaiting Approval

    Post by AttorneyAdmiral Sun Aug 07, 2016 11:24 am

    -----------------------
    Personal Info:
    -----------------------
    Name: (Your character's name)
    Stephen S. Pearson
    Nickname: (Your character's nickname, or something they're good at. OPTIONAL)
    Starsky (from the movie Starsky and hutch) (Good at law enforcement)
    Age: (Human years. Keep in mind humans only live up to 100 years at the most, while cats live much less than that, unless they have something that makes them live longer)
    32 Years of age
    Gender: (Obviously, if they're male, female or other)
    Male
    Sexuality: (Are they straight, homosexual, etc.)
    Straight
    Species: (What are they?)
    Human
    Alignment: (Evil/Neutral/Good/Chaotic, etc.)
    Good
    -----------------------
    Appearance:
    -----------------------
    Height: (In ft., cannot exceed 200 feet. If this complicates something, ask a Mod or Admin)
    5.9 ft
    Skin/Fur/Scales, Etc.: (What naturally covers them and the color)
    Human skin, white.
    Eyes: (Color of their eyes)
    Blue with a mix of green
    Hair: (What is their hair color? How is it designed or styled?)
    Dark brown hair, style is a #2 Caesar with the front flipped up
    Looks: (How do they look? Must be detailed)
    Healthy body form, fit, outfit is a Blue polo shirt marked with the United States Marshals insignia on the upper right breast, with a bold US MARSHALS on the back of the shirt under the collar. Jeans with a multi-tool law enforcement duty belt, black agency combat boots, a black watch on the left wrist of his arm, black shades covering his eyes, a radio unit coming from the utility belt wrapping around the back over his shoulder resting on the breast, and a federal agent golden badge on a black leather belt in the front of the character.
    ---------------------
    Specialties
    ---------------------
    Strengths/skills: (What are they good at?)
    Professional at fugitive apprehension, a quick and adaptable problem solver, a people person, and has a high attention to detail. Stephen is a leader.
    Weaknesses/Flaws: (What personal weaknesses or flaws does your character carry?)
    Stephen has no tolerance for insubordination, and can use vulgar language when in stressful situations such as a firefight.
    Special Abilities: (What can your character do that makes them unique?)
    Stephen's abilities include being able to uphold federal law enforcement as a US Marshal, use his duty belt tools such as a firearm, taser, pepper spray to fatigue hostiles, and handcuffs to detain subjects for safety.
    ---------------------
    Personality:
    ---------------------
    Personality: (How does your character act/feel? Must be at least 5 sentences long.
    Stephen is a man of honesty, and integrity. He has a passion to protect the innocent public, and to remove threats from public areas. Stephen takes his role as a US Marshal very seriously and upholds his position with professionalism. At times, Stephen is also very passionate towards those he protects, and loves to help people with their problems. Stephen feels a strong hatred towards criminals, murderers, and terrorists.
    Likes/Hobbies: (What does your like? Must have minimum of 4.)
    Stephen enjoys smoking imported cigars from various countries, working overtime, playing badminton, and listening to music.
    Dislikes: (What does your character dislike? Must have minimum of 4.)
    Stephen dislikes insubordination, harassment, cleaning, and lies.
    Fears: (What does your character fear? It can be a phobia or a thought. At least 2)
    Stephen has a drastic fear of spiders and centipedes, he will even use his firearm to kill them because they make his heart race too fast. Stephen also fears of dying, as he has a family to go home to alive every evening.
    ---------------------
    Family:
    ---------------------
    Parents: (Can be deceased or unknown.)
    Seth Stephens, father, deceased. Unknown mother. (presently)
    Mate: (N/A, if you don't have one.)
    N/A
    Offspring: (N/A, if you don't have any.)
    N/A
    Relative: (N/A, if you don't have any.)
    N/A
    Brothers/sisters: (N/A, if you don't have any.)
    N/A
    ---------------------
    History: (Brief history; Can explain more later. Optional)
    Stephen S. Pearson was born in Ontario, Canada. He grew up with a strict father, and a loving mother who both worked in some form of public service. Growing up learning more and more about law enforcement and the amount of injustice in his world, Stephen knew what he had to do. At the age of 27, Stephen became a United States Deputy Marshal.
    ---------------------
    RP paragraph: (At least 5 sentences of how you would RP. Can range from a daily activity to a fictional event. Be creative!)

    August 28th, 1994. In the city of Airstrip 1, US Deputy Marshal Stephen S. Pearson is walking the city streets along 7th avenue. The street is lined with small, broken run-down apartment buildings full of murderers, drug dealers, criminals, and the low-life scum of the beautiful city. Stephen was tasked with entering the brown, small building to the right side of the sidewalk from a local pub called "Brazzers steakhouse and beer". As Stephen crossed the street alone in his USMS uniform, he approached the building with caution as his task was to apprehend a possibly armed fugitive hiding in one of the rooms. Stephen made his way into the building from a back entrance 5 meters back from the sidewalk on the dark gleaming evening light. In front of him when he entered was the back of a small, white stairwell leading up to 4 rooms per level. There were about 4 levels to the building. Moving upstairs with his firearm raised and radio silenced to cover his approach, Stephen located the designated room. In front of him lay a wooden door, closed and marked "205". 205 was his designated room with the possible armed character. Stephen looked down, faith in his badge, and kicked the wooden door near it's handle. The door broke and collapsed inward the room. Stephen then followed the door and seen his suspect aiming a UZI sub-machine gun in his direction looking meaner than a snarling bulldog. Stephen stunned his gun, and called in the scene- as that was his only choice.


    Awaiting Approval  C2rip4



    Last edited by AttorneyAdmiral on Sun Aug 07, 2016 11:51 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : Paragraph edit)
    Dristan
    Dristan
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    Awaiting Approval  Empty Re: Awaiting Approval

    Post by Dristan Sun Aug 07, 2016 6:24 pm

    Hello, AttorneyAdmiral! I'll be evaluating your app today in order to assure a smooth transition into the world of The Beyond. Unfortunately, there are a few discrepancies regarding your character. Some are small and can be managed in seconds while others are a bit more heavy. Let's go in order.

    1. Your Weakness.
    In TB, the term "Weakness" is applied to an element of your person that could cause trouble for you in one or many ways. A chink in the armour. Such as an Ice user being weak to Fire or a Phoenix Paradigm being weak to Lightning. Characters normally have about two weaknesses or more so I'd suggest sticking to that.

    2. Special Abilities. Your abilities are very basic and simple, yet capable enough to get the job done. I respect that! In battle, simplicity is best. However, your descriptions of your capabilities are rather vague. You list off items and such, but that isn't necessarily how accurate we need a portrayal.

    "Stephen's abilities include being able to uphold federal law enforcement as a US Marshal, use his duty belt tools such as a firearm, taser, pepper spray to fatigue hostiles, and handcuffs to detain subjects for safety."

    Firearm:
    What kind? Is it special tech? Normal? What model of fire arm?

    Taser: What kind? A hand-grip taser? A projectile-based? What charge? Can it down a man, or perhaps powerful enough to disable a large animal such as a bear? How many times can it be used?

    Pepper spray: Normal pepper spray one could purchase anywhere? or perhaps a stronger, Xastristan military standard that can be shot in a cloud like incendiary detonations? Or anything that makes it special?

    Handcuffs: Typical, standard police handcuffs meant for detaining an average-sized human? Or cuffs that can fit various limbs, or perhaps stifle magic or transformations? Anything special? And details onto those as well in regards to limits.

    It may seem like a lot, but each of these really only require a few extra words. These details are, however, very necessary.

    3. Fears. In Fears, you state: "Stephen also fears of dying, as he has a family to go home to alive every evening."

    However, in the Family section, you state the following.

    Parents: (Can be deceased or unknown.)
    Seth Stephens, father, deceased. Unknown mother. (presently)
    Mate: (N/A, if you don't have one.)
    N/A
    Offspring: (N/A, if you don't have any.)
    N/A
    Relative: (N/A, if you don't have any.)
    N/A
    Brothers/sisters: (N/A, if you don't have any.)
    N/A

    You say you have a family to go home to, but then state you have no family! It's a small detail, but something worth fixing.

    4. Concept. Your entire character's concept is in fact, not applicable to TB. Namely because the United States of America is not something that is a part of TB! The Beyond is set in its own time and existence. The good ol' U. S. of A doesn't exist! Therefore, your character's general concept does not exist either.


    With these things in mind, I will be placing this application: On Hold

    Until these issues are addressed. Once everything has been all fixed up, bump the topic and I'll take a second look!

      Current date/time is Thu Nov 21, 2024 4:51 am